Dangerous Love
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title: "Dangerous Love" author: Darla Kane e-mail: DarlaB@gmx.de website: Angelic Art & Fiction distribution: Angelic Art & Fiction, AI, ff.net - anyone else just ask! :) rating: PG-13 pairing: Lindsey/Darla disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters - they all belong to Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy, WB, 20th Century Fox etc., the song "All I Wanna Do" belongs to the TV series "Fame L.A." and the lyrics were taken from the website www.fameforever.com spoilers: "Reprise", "Epiphany", "Dead End" & season 3 partly - the movie "Love Song" doesn't really count as a spoiler, does it? LOL! summary: 7 months after Lindsey has left L.A. ... anything more would give away the story... :) feedback: I'll be crying if you don't tell me what you think about it... :) dedication: Escy, you didn't think I'd ever finish it, did you? Well, me neither... but today my muse came back from her C/A vacation, so here it is. This is for you, hon'! *ring* Lindsey turned off his alarm clock. 6.45 AM - old habit of his to get up that early. Though he didn't really know why he still held on to that... It's been 7 months already since he had left Wolfram & Hart and so there was no office waiting for him. But somehow he couldn't get it out of his system, he supposed. Though he wished he could... It reminded him of a time when he hadn't cared about getting blood on his hands - sometimes even literally. His eyes wandered to his right hand - his 'evil' hand... well, not so evil anymore. He silently laughed. It had been fun to walk away from all these attorneys like that - and he hadn't been surprised that they had fallen for it... The expression on Lilah's face had been priceless! But in fact, since he had done the right thing and turned his back on Wolfram & Hart for good, there hadn't been any sign that his hand had once had a life of its own. However, he still felt sorry for that poor guy to whom it had actually belonged to originally... Another look on his clock - 6.51 AM. Yes, he *was* crazy. He didn't need to be at the gas station before noon when his shift began... So he could as well still stay in bed and get some rest. What a career! From Junior Partner in one of the most reputable law firms with a six-figure salary and a full benefits package to gas station attendant who's striving to make a buck. But he enjoyed it more than anything he had ever done. Okay, not really the gas station part but the freedom he now had. He'd been lucky to get that job pretty early after coming back to the place where he'd grown up, San Francisco. Sure, he still had quite a nice amount of money on his old bank account but as it was from Wolfram & Hart he did not really want to touch it unless it was inevitable. And what he got from his gigs wasn't really enough to pay his rent, either. His gigs... another thing he'd gotten to love again. Just jamming at local bars like he had done when he was still in high school. Really - he'd never felt better than right now. So it wasn't surprising, he drifted back to sleep with a smile on his face... Some hours later Lindsey woke up with a start... "Damn it!" The clock showed 11.30. "I'll be late for work!" He jumped out of bed, got dressed and hurried off. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Darla sat in a bar somewhere in San Francisco. She wondered what the hell had gotten her here... Well, actually she knew... and God, she hated him so much for that - for what he had done to her. Compared to that it had been nice of him to stake her in Sunnydale four years ago. Maybe that was what she should do - go back to L.A. and just stake him! "Angel Investigations - We help the helpless"... yeah right... what a big help he had been! What an angel! She might have laughed if she didn't feel so miserable. And that wasn't the only thing she felt. She also started to feel - jeez, the very thought was disgusting - she started to feel love. Something she had never experienced in her 400 years. She hated Angel for that! But did she really? Sure she did, she always tried to convince herself... but was it the truth? Some hidden part deep inside her thanked him silently. That really made her laugh now... She took another drink. Another thing she hated - that her mind always trailed off to the simple fact she wanted to ignore - the fact that she was beginning to love this little being inside her, Angel's child. She'd been to every seer and shaman in the western hemisphere by now but no one knew how this could be possible. That had been reason enough for her to kill every single one of them. At least it had made her forget about her state for a little while. A vampire carrying a baby... that was just ridiculous! But it really didn't seem funny to her. "I really hate this son of a bitch!", she thought to herself and was about to leave when a guy came on stage and started to play... When my faith is real When my hope is true Some kind of feelin' That I share with you Darla thought she recognized that voice but couldn't quite figure out of whom it reminded her. She turned around so that she would be able to see the small stage - and she couldn't believe who she saw... "Lindsey?", she whispered dumbfoundedly. Now I'll keep on believin' Anyway that I can And all I wanna do Is hold on to the memory of you And all I wanna do Is talk to That someone I knew She went closer to the stage to get a better look. Straight from my heart Tangled in moves Not tell myself I'm not missin' you Yes, it was really him... That stupid lawyer who brought her back - as a human! She felt anger rise inside her but somehow she also remembered that he'd been the only one who cared about her all the time since her return, even when she became a vampire again. "Naive and sweet," she thought to herself while Lindsey finished his song. When this long night is over I'll still think of you I'll think of you She had to admit - this guy had a great voice and he seemed to put all his heart into the song. That was a new side to the lawyer... "But what the hell brought him here?" She smiled slightly. "This might be fun." With that she finally left the club. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Lindsey got off stage. Tonight he had been in the mood to play but his band hadn't been on the bill so he had just asked if he could at least perform one song. He had picked his favorite - as always on such occasions. He wrote it not long after Darla had left and in way it was silently dedicated to her. Though she was part of his old life in L.A. she still meant a lot to him... He had never understood why she took off without a goodbye. Sure the girl was a vampire and all but hadn't she realized how much he cared about her? He may have overreacted a bit when he found out that she had slept with Angel but he would never have been able to abandon her... He sighed. "I wonder where she is right now." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some days later... Lindsey just came back from one of his gigs. He didn't know why but something had made him feel restless all evening. So he was glad when he stood in front of the door to his apartment finally. Just then he he heard someone call his name behind him. "Hi Lindsey. Long time no see." He turned around and looked right into Darla's eyes. No, this couldn't be... He drew a step back. "What is it, dear? Don't tell me you're afraid of me suddenly." Darla smiled one of her most enchanting smiles at him. Until then Lindsey hadn't yet realized the state she was in. Darla was pregnant? How the hell could *that* be? Somehow he was too shocked to say anything. "The lawyer at a lack for words... Jeez, I've never thought you'd have changed so much over the last few months." After a short pause she continued, "Or is it because of this?" Almost tenderly she stroke over her belly. "Ask me 'bout feeling uncomfortable." Lindsey finally regained his composure. "What do you want?" "Silly, do you always think I want something when I come to see you? Just thought I'd be polite and say hi to an old friend..." "Who do you wanna fool, Darla? You're never gonna change." "Guess I won't... but that's why you've missed me, haven't you?" Darla started to laugh. "I'm gonna go. See ya around." And with that she left. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It took Lindsey a while till he was able to move again and get inside his apartment. *This* must have been a *very* strange dream... It just couldn't be possible that he'd just seen Darla - *pregnant*! He sat down and poured himself a drink. "This is so weird. First she disappears and then suddenly shows up again after so long." He couldn't get why. So much for sure - she was still a vampire, she definitely had no soul. But why did she come here of all places? And how can it be that a vampire carries a child? Quietly he mumbled "Too weird." again... and suddenly the thought occurred to him that he might be in danger - he knew what Darla was capable of doing. But how come he'd never felt really afraid in her presence? And he still didn't... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In a motel room somewhere in the same area Darla also sat there, thinking. This had been fun. She had really enjoyed spinning Lindsey's head a little by showing up. And she knew him well enough to be sure that it had worked and smiled, satisfied with herself. But slowly another feeling crept up - the feeling that it had also been good to see him. It felt comfortable being around him, someone she knew. "Damn it! This can't be me thinking?!" Angrily she sent a glass of blood flying across the room. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some days had passed but no sign of Darla. Lindsey wondered if she had left town already - though that was rather unlikely. If he had learned one thing about her, it was that she loved to play games... and unfortunately he had been one of her favorite aims in L.A. He had done a lot of thinking lately - even considered paying W&H a visit to see if they knew something, esp. about her pregnancy. During all his years at the law firm he'd seen some strange, really strange things but none of those could match that. If someone had told him about it, he probably wouldn't have believed a single word. He smiled slightly. Darla was always full of surprises. Maybe that was why he had fallen for her in the first place. By now he knew she'd never return that feeling. The thought hurt - just like when he had found out about Angel. Lindsey had been taken care of her but she had nothing better to do than jump into bed with that jerk! Right then a realization sank in... Could it be that her child was Angel's? Somehow he felt the same anger dwell inside again. What a shame that old pick-up died 3 months ago... Right then some noise got him out of his reverie. It came from outside. Usually he wouldn't bother as he didn't live in the best neighborhood and there were always some fights but something just made him check. When he opened the door he didn't see anything at first. He was about to close it again when he noticed *her*... "Lindsey?" Darla's voice sounded softer than usual he quickly noticed but it could be just another one of her sick tricks. She just sat there on the staircase and looked almost lost, vulnerable. "It's driving me insane..." Reminded of her helplessness after Angel set her on fire, he just kneeled down beside her. "What is it? What's happened?" "All these feelings... They are making me sick. I can't get rid of it... I can't..." Though Lindsey knew he walked a dangerous line, he couldn't just leave her here. Gently he helped her up and tried to soothe her. "Come inside. Everything will be alright. I'll be there for you... shh." Darla just nodded and followed him. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Gently he covered her with a blanket. She had finally fallen asleep but still Lindsey wanted to stay by her side. She seemed to be so confused and nothing she told him had made much sense... Was this the same Darla that was brought back by Drusilla? He looked at the clock and knew he had to go to work though. He felt bad about leaving her alone like this. However, he had to go... So he silently left the apartment and hoped that she'd still be there when he came back. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Some hours later he came home. He'd even made sure to pick up some units of blood for her. But when he entered the living room and didn't see her on the couch anymore, he almost panicked. He knew he should have stayed! Damn! "The stars... they are beautiful, aren't they?" Lindsey felt relieved to find her standing near the window. "I never really noticed..." He went over to her and laid a hand on her shoulder. "I wanna help you. But I can't if you don't tell me what happened." "I wish I knew... Everything's so different." He took Darla back to the couch and both of them sat down. "It's the baby, isn't it?" She just nodded and there was silence in the room till she spoke again. "I love it... completeley." Lindsey was astonished. *That* had been the last thing he'd expected... Darla of all people felt love for something? "But these feelings aren't mine. It's its soul... It's haunting me. I feel so alone. Don't leave me... please," she sobbed. He just pulled her into his embrace and held her tightly. "Sssh sweet... I told you everything will be okay... I promise." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A month had already passed and Lindsey kept taking care of her... and she really seemed to be grateful. But during the last couple of days she'd been weird, which worried him quite a bit. "What's the matter?" Once again she was looking at the stars outside. It had become a kind of habit of hers and seemed to soothe her when she didn't feel well. "Nothing," she answered absent-mindedly. "Really?" They'd gotten to the point by now where she'd tell him everything and he had always thought she'd appreciate his concern. But this time her eyes just wandered over the gleaming city. "I've just been thinking..." "Don't wanna tell me about what?" He never got his answer... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The next night was the first of many to follow she went out without telling him. At first he was worried but when she came back home and didn't even apologize, he got angry. They ended up shouting at each other and her telling him that she didn't need a babysitter. Lindsey started to realize that something was changing again, which made him sad. After all he shouldn't forget that she was still a vampire - and unpredictable. But there were still nights she was so helpless when her child's soul seemed to overwhelm her. So he didn't give the danger he lived with everyday much thought. What he was thinking about was that she stayed out longer and longer each night and once she didn't even come back for a couple of days. Part of him feared the day she wouldn't come back at all - though it'd probably be for the better. He knew too well he had ended up in that vicious circle again that he thought he'd left behind in L.A. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The next time she was gone she stayed away for about two weeks and he'd already started doubting he'd ever see her again. By the end of the second week his life almost seemed back to normal - working at the gas station, performing in that small club... but when he entered his apartment he couldn't help but miss the danger that was Darla. He wondered if she and the baby were alright. Lost in memories he didn't notice that he wasn't alone this time. Not until she greeted him in a sweet voice, "Honey, I'm home." Something in the way she said it should have scared him but strangely it didn't. She radiated self-confidence he hadn't seen in her for a while. "Where you've been?" "Around." She sat down in his chair and let her legs dangle over the side of the armrests while watching him closely. "How's the baby? "Fine. Still has its pesky little soul but I can deal. How have you been? Missed me?" The sudden coldness in her voice put some small part of his reason on alert and told him to be cautious but still he wasn't afraid. "Why did you come back? You don't need me anymore, do you?" She got up slowly and came closer till she stood right in front of him and looked straight in his eyes. "Maybe I do... Maybe I don't... But you still need me, don't you?" she said in a tempting whisper before she kissed him. Lindsey honestly wanted to draw back but somehow he couldn't. It was as if he was under her spell. He probably was. "I knew you couldn't resist me." She smiled seductively. "That's what you've been dreaming about the past few weeks, haven't you?" Instead of responding he just captured her lips again and she started laughing. Too well it reminded him of Dru's and her little visit at the office after the massacre, which made him finally take a step back. "What do you really want, Darla?" "Maybe I just like to play games..." And before he could react, she was near him again. She bent to his neck, changed into vamp face and bit down hard. Lindsey just gasped and tried to struggle against her but her grip was too strong. He felt he was getting weaker while she slowly drained him. When he already thought he was going to die, she suddenly let go of him. He fell to the ground unable to move. His eyes just followed her when she morphed back into her human face and made her way to the door. Hand on the doorknob she turned around once more, smiled sweetly at him and said, "It's been fun. See ya around." And left him and his life for good.